The Last Time.
This is the last time I’m going to write about you.
I could probably write a book about you, and all the things we did together, but, at the end of the day, you couldn’t even write a sentence about me.
So I’m giving myself a rest. My Fingers know your name all to well and I cannot keep torturing myself, I cannot keeep pining after you. I have to accept reality, harsh as that may be, you don’t want a future with me and nothing I can write, say or do can change that.
Because while you are looking into her brown eyes, I see your blue ones every time I close my eyes.
When you told me you missed me, you didnt; because if you missed me you would have text me to see how I was doing, you would have done something to show you actually cared about me or us. You all of a sudden miss me when you see I’m trying my hardest without you, why didn’t you miss me when we were falling out? You missed me? Why didn’t you try to fix it like I did 5 months ago?
Truth is, I do not need to be with you to be happy; I do not need anyone to be happy because I am happy all on my own.
As strange as it sounds, sometimes I love you still but I hate you more than words can say for what you did but, and this sounds crazy, I’ve forgiven you. I’ve forgiven the situation becaues all this time where I didn’t forgive you it stopped me moving on for so long.
Just because I’ve let go and forgiven doesn’t mean I’m weak or vulnerable or even that I’m going to let you back into my life, because believe me I’m not, I’ve simply forgiven so I can move on – for MY benefit not yours.
I’m not saying I regret being with you or having you in my life, because I don’t. I wouldn’t change what happened because there was a time when we did have fun and you did make me smile but thank you for breaking my heart the way you did. I now know what I really deserve from someone and how I can be actually happy on my own.
So I’m closing the book on us – just like you did without any hesitation. Because everything has come to an end. It may have taken me longer and I may have cut my fingers on the corner of the pages, but I’ve done it…
I’m over you.
by one of our young people, Gemma McGrory, Devon
If you are suffering with difficult feelings around relationships or any other part of your life – please do visit our resources page,Youngminds, or get in touch and speak to Kerry, our mental health support worker, if you would like to get some more support.